Saturday, November 7, 2015

Walk Unafraid ~ 8 Months in LA

Walk Unafraid.

I just heard this beautiful song by First Aid Kit called Walk Unafraid.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDOIq21o40E

It pretty much sums up how I have been feeling the last few months here in LA.

The first 6 months of living here was very up and down for (and it still is but I now have a knowing and trust that everything will be alright). My living situation was not ideal, I was living in a room which had no door, not much privacy and other factors which did not make for an ideal place of comfort or creativity. I was more focussed on getting settled into a job, home and new city rather than focussing on my acting career. I wanted to do things differently this time.

I have lived in four cities in the last 6 years - Brisbane, Sydney, Vancouver and Los Angeles all in pursuit of my acting career. I had always tried to rush things with my acting when I first moved to a new city but this time I wanted it to be different. I needed to settle, get my bearings, make friends, make a supportive network, get ahead financially (haha! I think it's best to forget that one for now).

Within six months I had worked at two different jobs, neither of which fit what I needed specifically. I moved to a new apartment in September and started to finally feel settled. I had my own space, a room, a door, privacy and place to create!

And the acting world opened up at my feet again.

I secured a manager/agent and was starting to audition again. I booked my first LA gig, a short film paying only a small amount of money but I didn't care...I was acting again! It had been two years since I had booked anything. In Canada I was in class studying at least, but I had to focus on saving for my move to Los Angeles. That was the most important thing at the time.

I booked another short film called Little Bird and I finished shooting last week. It felt amazing to be on set again, working, playing, acting. Feeling. It's all a learning experience for me. I watched back some of the dailies and I thought "Oh I could have done that better," or "I wasn't connected" but at the end of the day if I'm learning that means I am making steps forward.

And it's all about the little steps.

I have also been going to the gym almost every day since I moved into my new apartment and that has played a HUGE factor in my mental health. I feel clear, calm and centered more than ever even though I don't have a job right now! I've been really getting into yoga lately - the spiritual and physical sides are so good for my soul.  I have lost around 22lbs (10kg) since leaving Canada and have done it in a healthy and safe way. I haven't been "dieting" or restricting food. I have just been 100% more active than I was in Canada and have also stopped eating gluten and dairy (except for chocolate sometimes ;) because of some intolerances I was experiencing.  I feel strong, inspired and motivated to continue cementing my spiritual, physical and mental health.

I also quit my job two days ago. It was very unexpected but a build up of tension with particular people lead me to stand up for myself and say NO. I no longer stand for this. It may not have been the best decision financially but I trust I will find a job very soon.

The past 6 years since I started pursuing this acting career has helped me walk unafraid. I no longer withstand being disrespected and treated like a child.

I don't think I would have done the same thing 6 years ago, but I am no longer a girl I am a woman with a voice.

This journey is inspiring me more and more every day.

Keep on fighting, keep on stepping forward and remember to walk unafraid.

With love,
Meisha



Meisha's Updates

"Take life in steps; each one is a journey to learn from." ~ Meisha